How To Succeed In Life

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Look at my brethren. I stumbled upon this regal character on my way past the recycling yard the other day. When I became cognizant of the brimming steel receptacle at the far side of the facility, his placid countenance immediately caught my attention.

Behold the contentment of a king upon his throne. Yes, his throne is technically made of garbage. And yet…

I feel envy, dear reader. I am green with it!

Perhaps at some distant point in the shrouded future, I, too, will have my own throne to sit upon and gaze out at the world far below. My dream feels so tangible. So within my reach! All I must do is climb a small mountain of rotting banana peels and shattered beer bottles to get there. Bring on the real challenge, I say. Rotting banana peels are delicious.

Wait, what am I saying? I am an author. A vaunted member of the literati. Our proverbial challenge is not a mountain of garbage. Nay. We are artists! We are faced with a mountain of… found materials!

 

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