Those of you who know me, have met me, or who have run screaming in the other direction are aware of my abiding appreciation for publishing advice. Enter “Book Titles that $$$ell!” from the good people at The Review Review.
The post consists of suggested book titles proposed by one Meg Pokrass on the The Book For Human Faces (that’s right, isn’t it? I am learning). After a quick perusal, I was enthralled by the literary marketing acumen therein. For example:
“How to Make Strangers Give You Lots of Money with No Effort”
“My Fingers Always Smell Bad After Work”
“Pictures of Cats and Food With No Words at All, by Who Cares?”
Genius! Dear reader, wouldn’t you agree?
Imagine my chagrin upon learning that the list of suggested titles were only base MOCKERIES. Jibes. “Burns,” if you will.
Well. If no one else will say it, I suppose that leaves it up to me. I must tell you, dear reader, that there is something to be learned here after all. Call them jokes if you will, but not I! No. I entered all of them in my moleskin for future reference. One never knows when one will be called upon to propose a book title in a meeting with a Random House executive, literary agent, James Franco, etc etc. It is best to be prepared (at least that is what a Boy Scout once told me before I chased him up a pine tree).
Here are a few of my own humble suggestions:
Sexiest Lichens of the Pacific Northwest
On Human Nature, A Sasquatch’s Notes
The Toilet: A Modern Miracle
The Most Humorous Cirrostratus Cloud Formations
This is only a beginning. Forgive me if I keep the best for myself. One final tip from yours truly: a chef never shares his entire recipe.
PS – If you are a Random House exective, I am available between the hours of midnight and 11:59 pm. If you are James Franco, between 1 and 1:30 pm on Mondays. #callme